Friday, July 16, 2010

How Things Change!

After completing radiation I found myself unbearably fatigued. As the months passed, I was also dealing with my inability to manage the household chores. My arm/hand gradually deteriorated to the point that felt I was at risk of becoming depressed if I did not seek help.

Living outside of a small village, I was amazed to find that I was able to obtain help locally. I spoke to Alison and she agreed to do it simply as a favour for the friend who had recommended her. Although I felt the sting financially, I decided it would go a long way towards keeping me sane. My friend Sue has Alison, and another team member, clean the lodges. Some will remember the view from Eagle Reach. Alison has built a very successful business with cleaning before and after departures and she has been coming weekly since the end of 2009, although she does not normally do private residences.

I was surprised to find when they arrived this past week that the helper did not speak on arrival. Normally I am attending my yoga class when they are here or, if I am in the house, I retreat to the study. Out of sight, out of mind. This past week I could not help but notice the noise as she rattled around the house. Given that the helper has always been friendly, I could not believe that she departed, with Alison, without a single word even though Alison bid me farewell cheerfully.

Concerned that I had done something to offend, I made a phone call to Alison. I learned during that conversation that this behaviour, although not a daily, or even weekly occurrence, does place more pressure on Alison when it happens. She simply does not feel confident to leave her assistant un-supervised. I explained that it was no problem for me, however, I could see that it may make it difficult for Alison to take time off work; for whatever reason. We decided that the behaviour was almost 'manic' and Alison said that she felt it could be a case of manic depression. Things are fine with medication, and yet it becomes apparent that the medication is either not taken, or changed, from time to time.

The following day, on our way home from the Oncology Support Group meeting at the cancer hospital, we called into Greenhills shopping centre. Shopping at the centre gives us the opportunity to catch up with Haydn's daughter Claire who works at the local Sanity music store. Imagine my surprise to find Alison's domestic assistant, seeing me, went out of her way to make contact. With a beautiful smile, and giving me a huge hug, she even managed to give me a peck on the cheek.

I suspect that our previous encounter had been completely forgotten.

The other great thing that has come from having Alison here to help is the recommendation to a friend of hers willing to help with ironing. Upon picking up my first basket of ironing from Kelly, I shed tears of joy when she said there would be no charge. The beautiful soul said that it is the least she can do to help at this time. This means the absolute world to me as I left my close friends behind when we made the move to the farm. I miss them dreadfully.


diane said...

Sounds like you may have made a new friend in the ironing lady and Alison. Hope your friendship develops.I am glad you have home help so you can enjoy doing the things that you can do.

Debby said...

You know, Chez, I think that I've been fumbling around with depression myself. I like the way that you simply acknowledged yours and stepped in to do something about it. I've simply been struggling to cope, having no time to do otherwise.

Anonymous said...

Chez good to hear you found a new friend,also you are so loved and friendly that i could listen to you for hours..Yayy no charge for ironing and thats the way it should be..I wish i lived closer will help you lots.xoxo

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.