Wednesday, November 17, 2010

To the Point!

Thank you for your comments which mean so much to me. Recently I have dropped behind with my replies and, God willing, I will manage to get caught up. Please don't hold your breath, just in case! I can promise I will do my best.

The popular conception of therapy usually goes something along the lines of client, couch and therapist, coupled with a notepad and talk. Yesterday went well! Jeremy's birthday passed smoothly! Many candles were lit on his Memory-of site and I received countless personal messages, giving me a sense of being personally blessed.  This led me to Google 'Group Therapy.' According to Georgetown University Counseling and Psychiatric services, Group Therapy is a powerful venue for growth and change.The isolation of farm life, along with a degree of disability, gives me more time to think than I would like. Definitely, time to grow and time to change! Therefore, being part of a group allows me to connect with others in a similar situation. Although the circumstances of my breast cancer recurrence appear to be somewhat unique, the blogging community provides a safe forum, along with emotional support, in my daily battle. Social Networking also gives me access to a large diverse group of individuals offering warmth and providing support. This is the perfect forum to say a huge 'Thank You.'

Dr Sales yesterday checked both the rash on my eyelid and the mark on my jaw line. Thankfully, neither is cause for concern. The rash is a scratch that has become slightly infected while the spot is a skin cancer but...NOT A MELANOMA! I have always used Curaderm for Basal Cell Carcinoma treatment so will probably do the same with this one. He was however, concerned about my current level of  fatigue, as well as the results from the Doppler ultrasound, which showed a complete obstruction of the subclavian and axillary veins indicating extensive post treatment changes within the soft tissue of the right axilla.

I have an appointment with my radiation oncologist on Friday. Dr Sales has suggested I may need further testing. I am normally reluctant to undergo testing unless the symptoms suggest there is some sort of activity. I feel testing is essential at this stage, in spite of my belief that testing increases risks.. The problem could be radiation damage, tumour growth or very extensive blood clotting. Whatever it is, it is a cause for concern.

The one thing I have noticed is that when I feel well in myself I worry less about outcomes. I let my body be the barometer of the soul. As I have been feeling 'out of sorts' as well as fatigued I am 'looking for trouble.' Not a good thing!

On a lighter note, today I had a manicure and pedicure done. Not being able to do my own has become a nightmare. The nails on my right hand often look like 'claws.' I have only just located Tracey, offering a mobile service. In spite of giving explicit instructions about care being taken with cuticles etc I have been left with red, inflamed toes. I think rather than 'pushing' the cuticles back, they were 'shoved.' As you can imagine, I have been applying Tea Tree Oil all afternoon in the hope of reducing the risk of infection. Drat! There has to be a better way!

‘We cannot tell the exact moment a friendship is formed; as in filling a vessel drop by drop, there is at last a drop which makes it run over; so in a series of kindnesses, there is at last one that makes the heart run over’. Author unknown


13 comments:

stonepost said...

Good Morning Chez, I am so happy the rash was simple and slight! Wow
we could have a claw fight! I lost the nails on my big toes and thumbs
but the ones I have left are curled and painful and impossible for me to trim. I have worked with my hands and tools all my life and now I can't operate sizzors! I can't zip my pants up either but that is a little more fun!

Kaz said...

Chez hope the test will show something that can be worked out.know i am always here for you if you need a shoulder or a ear to cry on.Thanks god for pc and phone as it gives you a way not to be alone on the farm.Praying for a break for you. Know Jezz is wrapping his angel wings around his gorgeous Mum. Talk to you your morning i hope.

Love Kazzy & gentle hugs always.xo

Audrey said...

Dear Chez, I am so sorry to read that you are not feeling well - for my money, fatigue has got to be the worst! It drags you down physically, emotionally and mentally. For me, it is when I am fatigued that my worry and stress levels go up! A few good sleeps and I am usually good to go again. I hope that the same is true for you. Prayers and love to you!
xoxoxo

nancyspoint said...

Chez, I think physical and mental fatigue is almost a thing to be expected for you during this month that holds so many memories. Mental fatigue is very real. I'm glad the news about the rash was good. Hopefully you'll have a good appt on Friday. Continuing to think of you as you make your way through this week filled with memories of Jeremy's birthday.

Futomara said...

Just wanted to pop by and let you know I'm thinking of you and wishing you the best.

BreastCancerSisterhood.com said...

Chez,
Wish you were with me now. I'm at a 4 day retreat for women cancer survivors, nurses and advocates. We're overlooking a beautiful lake outside of Austin, Texas. Two of the seminar topics are "Wellness in a Storm" and "Living with Courage." I will take notes for you:)

Mental and physical fatigue do go hand in hand. Jeremy wouldn't want you to be so stressed. Perhaps you can close your eyes and think of that, and think about places you've been, good places & good times. Stay there, in your mind, as long as you can.

Love,
Brenda

BreastCancerSisterhood.com said...

Chez,
Wish you were with me now. I'm at a 4 day retreat for women cancer survivors, nurses and advocates. We're overlooking a beautiful lake outside of Austin, Texas. Two of the seminar topics are "Wellness in a Storm" and "Living with Courage." I will take notes for you:)

Mental and physical fatigue do go hand in hand. Jeremy wouldn't want you to be so stressed. Perhaps you can close your eyes and think of that, and think about places you've been, good places & good times. Stay there, in your mind, as long as you can.

Love,
Brenda

BreastCancerSisterhood.com said...

Chez,
Wish you were with me now. I'm at a 4 day retreat for women cancer survivors, nurses and advocates. We're overlooking a beautiful lake outside of Austin, Texas. Two of the seminar topics are "Wellness in a Storm" and "Living with Courage." I will take notes for you:)

Mental and physical fatigue do go hand in hand. Jeremy wouldn't want you to be so stressed. Perhaps you can close your eyes and think of that, and think about places you've been, good places & good times. Stay there, in your mind, as long as you can.

Love,
Brenda

Come At Me Bro said...

Sweet story!

Kaz said...

Chez think that Brenda's post went 3 times is a sign my friend and know you will see that and use it..

Love gorgeous lady.xo Kaz

Alli said...

My dear friend Cheryl,
Simple and to the point and you get what I mean...
just get up and dance!!!

Love Alicia xxx

Maundering mutterer said...

Never worry about late replies, just keep posting! I'm glad you had a chance to spoil yourself. I'll be holding thumbs for you and those tests.

Jeanne Marren Egan said...

Chez,

I feel for you this week. It must be so difficult right now because of Jeremy's birthday. I love that you got a mani pedi and then had to laugh about your shoved cuticles. Is there ever anything that can just go smoothly? You have such a great attitude. Keep posting and don't worry about replies. We are all here for you. Oh, and good luck with the Tea Tree oil!